Heres the deal...

[sunshinecindy]

Some of you it seems have got your feelings hurt over some responses in threads or directions given by the mods. They aren't here to harass you, they are here to enforce SR rules and SR forum rules. These rules are in place for a reason, not just because we felt like making a sticky that was 12 inches long. We are happy that these women have even volunteered to help us watch the boards which leaves more time for the SR crew to be looking for deals and offers. Please don't get offended. We aren't pointing fingers at anyone in particular. If you break one of the rules, you will be notified of it, either by warning or infraction. Every good forum has rules, and SR has rules for offers and merchants that we need to follow in order to get the best we can from our merchants, therefore, we try to keep the forum looking its best, because believe it or not, they do lurk here, quite frequently. Newcomers need to read the rules, thats why we have the sticky on them. Arguing back with the mods won't get you anywhere. If you are not sure whether something can be discussed here, or if you have a problem with something that is being discussed here, PM the mods, they will help you. We want everyone to feel like they have freedom of speech, but within reason and our guidelines. Its you guys that make this forum and SR the fun place to escape our daily routines, and you've done a great job building this community. Everyone here contributes so much to the others. Good job to all our forum members and mods. :clap:

[llgray16]

I can't imagine that anyone would be upset by what a mod has to say here. I think that the mods (and members) are very helpful and kind even in some situations where many other people would lose their cool. The only way I can see someone being upset is if a member is hiding something, being untruthful or acting in an irresponsible way and don't like the response that they hear. Even in those situations I think that the mods here are VERY careful to walk a clear line in outling the guidelines and directing members to the right path in a very tactful way.

Because of the closeness of our community, I think sometimes some people do lose track of the fact that SR is a business and has to follow very close rules. SR has been negatively impacted by the improper behavior of members in the past and has to take a strong and vigilant stance against it. It is for the good of SR (by SR I mean the company and its' members!)

OK - that was just one member's take on it :sunshine:

[jollytammy]

:thanks:

[icartjetta]

Thanks, for the nice words.
Sometimes rules are just needed.

[lanny76]

I suppose I have been guilty of taking something personally in the past - when I understand it isn't really meant to be given that way. I do appreciate the work the mods do, and see that the guidelines have been very effective in keeping the SR forums clean and wholesome and fun as well. I don't see that there has really been anything unkind or cruel said in enforcing guidelines, either - people just don't flame people on SR, which is a very wonderful thing, since I have seen nasty forums where this is done, by moderators/administrator. Not good. But SR is a well-run and good-hearted forum, so thanks for making it that way!!

[DarcyDog]

My thoughts . . .

I got a warning from a mod a few days ago because I used a vendor's name in a post. My first reaction was "Wow! That was harsh!" Then I did recall that the rules do specifically say you can't do that, so the warning was appropriate. I did PM the mod and apologize for the mistake. I think the word "warning" immediately put me in the mindset that the words were meant to be more harsh than intended. Sometimes things don't come across in writing (emails, posts, etc.) in the same way as you would say it to the person if you could talk to them. For example, I used to end all of my email messages with what I thought was a happy and cheerful "Thanks!" I came to find out that on occasion, it was interpreted as an angry "Thanks!" (like "Thanks for Nothing!!"). Aaah, but if only I could have said it, the tone of my voice could have told them what kind of thanks I meant.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's a two way street. You gotta watch how you write something and you gotta watch how you interpret something. Maybe step back and take a minute to think before reacting.

Maybe we could find a kindler, gentler word other than "warning." Maybe the first infraction could be called an "Oops." :)

[jnorth1007]

I understand what your saying about the word warning but it is a system word LOL we don't actually type that part. When we give a warning we just type the little message that tells you why and the rest is system generated. We have it set up so that warnings expire in 10 days and so they don't really serve any function except to say oops you made a mistake and we wanted to let you know. If it is something bigger the note will say Infraction instead of warning. Hopefully this will help to explain it a little and thank you for you guys for your input and kind words.

[sunshinecindy]

My thoughts . . .

I got a warning from a mod a few days ago because I used a vendor's name in a post. My first reaction was "Wow! That was harsh!" Then I did recall that the rules do specifically say you can't do that, so the warning was appropriate. I did PM the mod and apologize for the mistake. I think the word "warning" immediately put me in the mindset that the words were meant to be more harsh than intended. Sometimes things don't come across in writing (emails, posts, etc.) in the same way as you would say it to the person if you could talk to them. For example, I used to end all of my email messages with what I thought was a happy and cheerful "Thanks!" I came to find out that on occasion, it was interpreted as an angry "Thanks!" (like "Thanks for Nothing!!"). Aaah, but if only I could have said it, the tone of my voice could have told them what kind of thanks I meant.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's a two way street. You gotta watch how you write something and you gotta watch how you interpret something. Maybe step back and take a minute to think before reacting.

Maybe we could find a kindler, gentler word other than "warning." Maybe the first infraction could be called an "Oops." :)

Thats some very good points, and if the mods sometime seem a little irritated, its because they are. Sometimes we give a warning, and edit the post, and 3 posts later, someone does the same thing. At times it can be exasperating, and sometimes its the "no tone heard" that does make it seem harsher then it is. I guess what Im wanting is for the membership not to take it to heart, and to understand why we have the rules in place and why we have mods to enforce them and to maybe, occasionally, just review the stickies which would help avoid a lot of this. Maybe we can even do a poll or have a contest on the best word to replace "warning".

[DarcyDog]

I understand what your saying about the word warning but it is a system word LOL we don't actually type that part. When we give a warning we just type the little message that tells you why and the rest is system generated. We have it set up so that warnings expire in 10 days and so they don't really serve any function except to say oops you made a mistake and we wanted to let you know. If it is something bigger the note will say Infraction instead of warning. Hopefully this will help to explain it a little and thank you for you guys for your input and kind words.


Infraction! Yikes! I'm not sure my poor heart could take it if I got one of those! :rotfl: I'll have to be on my toes so I don't mess up again!

[askomsky]

My thoughts . . .

I got a warning from a mod a few days ago because I used a vendor's name in a post. My first reaction was "Wow! That was harsh!" Then I did recall that the rules do specifically say you can't do that, so the warning was appropriate. I did PM the mod and apologize for the mistake. I think the word "warning" immediately put me in the mindset that the words were meant to be more harsh than intended. Sometimes things don't come across in writing (emails, posts, etc.) in the same way as you would say it to the person if you could talk to them. For example, I used to end all of my email messages with what I thought was a happy and cheerful "Thanks!" I came to find out that on occasion, it was interpreted as an angry "Thanks!" (like "Thanks for Nothing!!"). Aaah, but if only I could have said it, the tone of my voice could have told them what kind of thanks I meant.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's a two way street. You gotta watch how you write something and you gotta watch how you interpret something. Maybe step back and take a minute to think before reacting.

Maybe we could find a kindler, gentler word other than "warning." Maybe the first infraction could be called an "Oops." :)


Wow I never thought it could be taken like that... "Thanks!" bc I end almost ALL emails with that.... :) So far no one has indicated that it offended them, but your so right, you can't hear the "tone" in an email, post, forum etc.

PS. "Thanks!" must be a PA thing! lol

[fourfoxesinpa]

What about "Reminder?"

:thanks:

[marcymajor]

how about FYI.

[bbangel]

Maybe Note or Notice?

I don't really have a problem with warning though.

And a big :clap: and :thanks: for those working to make this such a great community. You are appreciated even if sometimes it doesn't feel like it (just like a good mom!)

[lanny76]

What about "Reminder?"

:thanks:

Maybe for a first warning - that's something that would perhaps help people not think they're being scolded or scalded or whatever! More of an - here's your oops moment, try not to do it again.
It's true - some words are kind of like a red flag in people's perception.
The word 'warning' does serve to make an impression though! An impression that it is important to remember these rules.

[askomsky]

Thats some very good points, and if the mods sometime seem a little irritated, its because they are. Sometimes we give a warning, and edit the post, and 3 posts later, someone does the same thing. At times it can be exasperating, and sometimes its the "no tone heard" that does make it seem harsher then it is. I guess what Im wanting is for the membership not to take it to heart, and to understand why we have the rules in place and why we have mods to enforce them and to maybe, occasionally, just review the stickies which would help avoid a lot of this. Maybe we can even do a poll or have a contest on the best word to replace "warning".

I can completely understand how exasperating it can be when the same things are done over and over or the same questions over and over.
Heck I've been around for almost a year and once in a while I just get too excited or have a brain fart and go and type something I shouldn't. I don't mean to do it, I catch it after the fact and even before I can edit it a mod has it taken care of. I usually check to see which mods are on and apoligize for my goof, bc I know that they are doing this on their OWN time. There also have been times where posts have been deleted and I just pm a mod (instead of a discussion on the forum) and ask for an explanation if I don't understand exactly why it was removed. I'm not questioning their authority when I do it, I usually say right off the bat, that I understand that they have to but for future reference could you tell me why.......just so I don't do it again.

So anyhow.... GOOD JOB bc like someone else said no one gets flamed here and that's what keeps everyone coming back.

A rule is a rule, 9 times out of 10 if your boss tells you to do something, you do it, you don't question them! :sunshine: (Still trying to get my kids to understand that one.)

[SunshineGirl]

Unfortunately, it's the software itself that has "warning" built in, so we can't really change it. Our only options are "warning" or straight to infraction. ACK! We wouldn't want to do that.

[MooseBrains]

Words in type are so hard to understand since there is no body language and facial cues to take in what context they are being said.

Because of that what may come off harsh is just someone trying to help. When a response is very matter of fact or snarky I remind myself that I asked for the help and it may not be the answer I want but it is an answer. The person who replied has taken time to "help" me understand something. JMO

[m 'n c]

I think the key is to try not to read too into things if the mod replies to a thread or gives you a warning about something. The reason we give you a heads up is so that you can avoid the infraction. Typically we aren't too mad or yelling if you get a warning. They do expire after 10 days so they don't stay on your permanent record. We try to save our anger for the spammers and sending them infractions.

[pbhall13]

Sometimes I feel like if I haven't had a chance to look over the forum during the day I become very lost....and I am an 'old timer' on SR. At first I was reading cindy's post thinking we got a new 'deal' for shopping (I am not that quick, I am the first to admit it)

Now that I am up to speed........I agree with what cindy and the sr gang has said......you cannot take the wording too personally...after all they are words and we cannot hear the tone of people (I choose to hear everyone with a postivie/upbeat voice.....that way I am not offended when things are said that may not be how I would have written them).

Rules are rules and they are clearly posted.

That being said........if I ever offend anyone in future of have in the past....I apologize up front :o

Have a great day!!

Pamela

[m4travels]

I'm just lucky there's no such thing as a Felony; I'm sure I'd be the first!!

[spring]

QUOTE=m4travels;162871]I'm just lucky there's no such thing as a Felony; I'm sure I'd be the first!![/QUOTE]

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

[mollyeilis]

.... PM the mods, they will help you.

I thought you all had turned OFF the PMs for mods and admins. Hmm, guess it was not mod-inclusive. Here's the super-confused thought I knew something but finding out I'm wrong emoticon: :confused:

[jnorth1007]

The admins have theirs turned off but the mods- me, traci, catherine and heather have ours on all the time.

[disneyforever]

I'm just lucky there's no such thing as a Felony; I'm sure I'd be the first!!

And I would probably be right behind you! :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

[andrea2289]

The tone of online communication is easily misinterpreted. I think it goes both ways that, at times, we do have to make a conscious effort to watch the way we say things. :rolleyes:

Everyone makes mistakes. You can't be a member of a board as long as some of us have and not ever have a brain fart! :D

[m4travels]

You can't be a member of a board as long as some of us have and not ever have a brain fart! :D

And some can be pretty stinky!

[icartjetta]

And some can be pretty stinky!

Are you speaking from experience????? :rotfl:

[ligrumpygirl]

Are you speaking from experience????? :rotfl:

Better watch out...as the newest mod they may send you one or two of these!

[Sunni]

Are you speaking from experience????? :rotfl:
:rotfl: