Bwa ha ha.

Having been a GOOD customer service rep, I am mystified by bad assistance. The type that tells me "I can't help you, go to our site and look at the Help section on how to cancel."

Um, yeah, I've been there, and it says to call, but you weren't OPEN so I emailed. As detailed in my email to you. But really, you couldn't just tell me to call? You want me to go back to my account, thinking maybe there's a button to click, when I'm just going to find the message to call in?

And then she says "if you want to just delay shipments you can put them out to 8 weeks." Oh, you mean the way I HAVE IT?

And also "if you were part of a special signup you might have further obligations". Yep. Why not peer into my account, take those 5 seconds, just so you don't have to include that part of the blurb that isn't accurate for me?

It doesn't take that long to be good, and it frustrates people so much less... Sigh.